What if I never give you an update?
This question lingers in the air, heavy with the weight of unspoken truths. What if I never tell you where I am or how I’m doing? What if my silence speaks louder than my words ever could?
The first thought that comes to my mind is to take time for myself. To stop overthinking and worrying about people who aren’t even thinking of me. What if I chose to prioritize my peace, happiness, and wellbeing over everything else?
If you never get an update from me, understand that I’m choosing my peace over anything.
Imagine the freedom in that choice. The liberation of knowing that I don’t have to put up with anyone’s toxicity or demands. What if I decided that my mental health matters more than keeping up appearances or maintaining connections that drain me?
Would you understand if I told you that after everything I’ve been through, I need this time to heal? I’ve learned that giving myself the space and time I need is essential. I’ve realized that I don’t need to seek answers outside when the only answers that matter are within.
If I don’t update you, it’s because I’m living my life. I’m embracing the solitude that allows me to breathe, think, and simply be.
I don’t want anyone to ruin my happiness or peace.
Is that too much to ask?
There’s a power in moving away from toxic people and situations. In saying, “I don’t owe you an explanation, my peace will always come first.” Sometimes, in life, we need to choose ourselves. We need to put our happiness and peace above all else, even if it feels selfish at first.
Why do we feel guilty for putting ourselves first? Why do we think it’s our responsibility to make sure others are okay before we ensure our own wellbeing? It’s time to stop explaining ourselves, our actions, and our decisions. It’s time to stop trying to please everyone else and start thinking about what we need to be okay.
If ever you don’t get an update from me, know that I’ve chosen myself.
I’ve chosen to prioritize my peace and happiness, to step away from the chaos and embrace the calm. I’m not disappearing; I’m just finding myself in the silence, in the moments where I don’t have to be anything for anyone but me.
Isn’t that the truest form of freedom? To live for yourself, unapologetically, embracing the peace that comes with being alone but not lonely, content but not complacent? If ever you don’t get an update from me, understand that I’m finally giving myself the love and attention I deserve.
Sometimes in life, we need to choose ourselves, our happiness, and our peace over anything else. We need to put ourselves first, above anyone or anything. Yes, it can be hard, and we might feel guilty at first, but we need to prioritize ourselves after all we’ve been through. We need to stop trying to explain ourselves, our actions, and our decisions to others. We need to stop trying to please others and make sure they’re okay; we need to think about ourselves and make sure we’re okay first.
